Killing with Kindness

killing with kindness

Tuesday 10th December, 2013 – Killing with Kindness……

 I was having a conversation with a friend on the weekend about tattoos and that when I get back to my goal weight of 63kg I want a Phoenix tattoo to commemorate my achievement (you know, rising from the ashes and all that), which opened up the whole “but you’re not fat” topic.

 Now before anyone starts down this path, I know the figure on the scale is insignificant (well at the size I am it is because I’m holding a lot more fat, when I am leaner yes, physical size and measurements matter more than scale weight)……..

 Now, I love my friends (I’m sure they are probably reading this hoping I’m not talking about them) I truly love them and know that they are looking out for my best interest and simply loving and supporting me.

 But look, I know I’m not fat to look at so to speak. Well beauty is in the eye of the beholder so I firmly believe that some people out there may differ in opinion on this. But in general and to a certain extent, yes I agree with my friend, I’m not fat. Truthfully, in my eyes I’m bigger than I’m use to being and people are use to seeing. But yes, I’m not standing out from the crowd here.

 BUT I AM OVERWEIGHT !!! My body fat % is well over 30%, well over !! OK it’s closer to 40% but I don’t like admitting it. My visceral fat is a level 5/5 on the old composition scales. That is the highest level !!!. My bio age is 50 !!! 15 years older than me !!! My poor poor organs are choking on fat. CHOKING…..

 It is unhealthy !!! Right now I am unhealthy !!!! and saying “but you look fine as you are” is sweet, but also enabling and endorsing being unhealthy !!! You want me to be unhealthy ?????  I do need to get the weight off (in a healthy way of course or I’ll do even more damage). I cannot stay like this. I am opening myself up to many issues like heart disease and diabetes. Two sides of that compliment coin hey ???

 So please, next time you want to lay some love on someone who wants to lose some weight but is not (in your eyes) fat, think outside the box a little, there may just be more to the story than simply looks. Maybe just be encouraging and say something positive in a sense of “go you”, “can’t wait to see your reach your goals”….. It’s a lot better than starting the whole annoying defensive conversation of “Oh no you misunderstood, don’t get me wrong, I know I’m not fat but……….”

 And yes, some people really do just want to hear you say “you look fine as you are”, I get that. I’m just saying maybe give it some thought ?? Being overweight is more than looks. It kills people. Do you want to be an enabler of unhealthy habits ?? or do you want to be a part of something bigger and help someone move towards a lifestyle where they may just have a few more years added on to spend with their loved ones ??